Big things come in small packages:
• Yes of course; like a diamond engagement ring, an American express (no limit) black card, a blackberry touch and an I-pad!
Great things start with small beginnings:
• True, but let’s begin with a 2 winged mansion, 2 luxury cars, the yatch and private jet can come after 6 months.
Pride goes before a fall;
• Phew! Back then we used to lodge at the Burj Al’ arab but now we just put up at the four seasons.
Age is nothing but a number:
• Sure, who cares if he is 100years and has no a tooth, or 12years and barely has public hair. As long as he has money, and a lot of it in the bank too.
All that glitters is not gold:
• Yeah sure, diamonds glitter even more.
All fingers are not equal:
• I understand; that’s why I asked for an 18 carat instead of a 24 carat.
Money isn’t everything:
• Of course I know. That’s why I choose to pay in kind.
Look before you leap:
• Of course, there’s no way I’m letting my jimmy choo or manolo blahnik in the mud.
A stitch in time saves nine:
• Sure...whenever my dress needs a stitch, I buy nine.
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Monday, October 25, 2010
THE GROWN MAN AND THE DOG
Sometimes in life,we neglect the abstract;the truths that seems so clear but yet lies so hidden. An instance, is the failure to see our human selves through the eyes of animals. Wether we like it or not,we too are animals.Higher though, the human is, but true is the fact that our lives sometimes seem alike. Far from it our animal instincts but closer yet,the different stages of our lives; the basis of my theory.
After a long evening at the bar with a friend, he gets a call from a Dog Breeder to come and check out a puppy.We exitedly left together,to see this little 'man's best friend'. It was the cutest caucasian I had ever seen. It was chubby and hairy and its nose was so wet it looked like a stuffed animal.
I picked it up and carried it like a baby. I played with it; I rubbed its fur, tickled it and let it chase after me. It loved it and it rolled on its back asking for more then I paused! I took a long look at it and stared into its brown eyes and I realized that this lovely cheerful puppy would grow into a fierce, vicious and perhaps ferocious Dog!
He wouldn't whine,and would not like you to carry him and tickle him without caution anymore. He would prefer to eat more bones with some flesh but not milk and then when you try to make him chase too long,he would bark,bark and bark in anger!
Now you wonder why I am telling you this story, but take a while and ponder; can you see the grown man through the eyes of a Dog? Do they share a similar story from boy to man: puppy to dog?
As a boy, I was my mom's cute puppy. Oh! How she loved to toss me,tickle me,carry me in her arms and cuddle me warmly. I did not resent it one bit. I loved to be tied to her apron and seat on her laps and be willing to do as she says. I would roll on my back and ask for more.
However as a grown man, a fine Dog I have become. Not resenting mom's love but not wanting to be fed milk anymore. I have loosened myself from her apron and I have carved my own space. I am not disobedient but I am not entirely obedient. I bark sometimes when my space is getting crowded and I need some air,I bark really loud when I am being made to chase for too long.It is not a sign of rebellion, it is not anarchy, it is simply the dog; the grown man.
Sometimes mom doesn't understand that the grown man is still that boy only now with his own mind and opinions he wishes to be respected. The grown man is the boy but sandwiched between live ambitions, naked emotions, and human chemistry. He still has a pee-pee but the bushes in its vine makes it a penis and he becomes aware of its other functions.
The grown man is not angry, only not happy to learn that the world, as he once knew it,now had a bed that is not all roses but delicately blended with thorns and he must lie on it. The boy hasn't changed, he only has experienced so much,he has grown.
finally,no matter how far a dog wonders,like the grown man too,he is almost always going to find his way back home.So when he barks, beneath it all,try once more to hear him whine,only then would you understand that he is still that cute little puppy that you once cuddled warmly only now he wants to be heard.woof!woof!!woof!!!
After a long evening at the bar with a friend, he gets a call from a Dog Breeder to come and check out a puppy.We exitedly left together,to see this little 'man's best friend'. It was the cutest caucasian I had ever seen. It was chubby and hairy and its nose was so wet it looked like a stuffed animal.
I picked it up and carried it like a baby. I played with it; I rubbed its fur, tickled it and let it chase after me. It loved it and it rolled on its back asking for more then I paused! I took a long look at it and stared into its brown eyes and I realized that this lovely cheerful puppy would grow into a fierce, vicious and perhaps ferocious Dog!
He wouldn't whine,and would not like you to carry him and tickle him without caution anymore. He would prefer to eat more bones with some flesh but not milk and then when you try to make him chase too long,he would bark,bark and bark in anger!
Now you wonder why I am telling you this story, but take a while and ponder; can you see the grown man through the eyes of a Dog? Do they share a similar story from boy to man: puppy to dog?
As a boy, I was my mom's cute puppy. Oh! How she loved to toss me,tickle me,carry me in her arms and cuddle me warmly. I did not resent it one bit. I loved to be tied to her apron and seat on her laps and be willing to do as she says. I would roll on my back and ask for more.
However as a grown man, a fine Dog I have become. Not resenting mom's love but not wanting to be fed milk anymore. I have loosened myself from her apron and I have carved my own space. I am not disobedient but I am not entirely obedient. I bark sometimes when my space is getting crowded and I need some air,I bark really loud when I am being made to chase for too long.It is not a sign of rebellion, it is not anarchy, it is simply the dog; the grown man.
Sometimes mom doesn't understand that the grown man is still that boy only now with his own mind and opinions he wishes to be respected. The grown man is the boy but sandwiched between live ambitions, naked emotions, and human chemistry. He still has a pee-pee but the bushes in its vine makes it a penis and he becomes aware of its other functions.
The grown man is not angry, only not happy to learn that the world, as he once knew it,now had a bed that is not all roses but delicately blended with thorns and he must lie on it. The boy hasn't changed, he only has experienced so much,he has grown.
finally,no matter how far a dog wonders,like the grown man too,he is almost always going to find his way back home.So when he barks, beneath it all,try once more to hear him whine,only then would you understand that he is still that cute little puppy that you once cuddled warmly only now he wants to be heard.woof!woof!!woof!!!
Friday, September 17, 2010
IF ISLAM MEANS PEACE....
Reading the news papers and watching the news, on both local and international television stations, I am compelled to ask questions. I know I might not get the answers I hope for but if only I could get a good explanation of why world peace is being threatened by religious extremism and radicalism and why the holy prophet Mohammed’s (SAW) faithful are always in complicity.
During my days as a corps member, my closest friend was a calm and gentle Muslim. In the wake of the Boko-Haram crisis, while I was bemoaning the onslaught and the fact that the north is highly flammable like an open keg of petrol waiting for a naked flame, my friend told me that Islam actually means peace; to guide my judgement. I was surprised because I was hearing this for the first time but only now, it made me more confused.
Truly, Islam may mean peace but Scars from the 9/11 terrorist attack still hurt and recent attacks in northern Nigeria by the Boko-Haram sect, Farouk Abdul-Muttalab’s saga, and daily news of bombings from around the world where Muslims are predominant makes it hard to synonymise Islam with peace.
In northern Nigeria, citing the case of the Boko-Haram sect, whose leader; an Islamic scholar and cleric, gathered together or should I say recruited ignorant and vulnerable faithful and began to indoctrinate them against all things western and non-Islam. He certainly was preaching violence as he and his followers left sorrow, tears and blood in the city where they struck. I ask again then, as a cleric and scholar of Islam wasn’t he supposed to be preaching peace? Clearly, he wasn’t.
However, before I am misunderstood, I am not saying that any religion is void of extremism or its manifestations but please watch CNN or even the news from the local stations and you will not be surprised as news of the consequences of men who kill and maim in God’s name and to punish America (like some believe), or like Boko-Haram; to protest against western or anti-Islam education, and for other various reasons begin to roll-in by the hour like the stock market update.
I am moved to tears each time I hear of these killings in Afghanistan, Iraq, Borno, Bauchi, Jos, Kano, and many other places where Islam prevails. It hurts more when I hear that men who carry out these dastardly acts do so for the purpose of attaining al-Jana (heaven) and a promise of a certain number of virgins(I stand to be corrected). How cruel! What kind of god allows you into paradise and gets you laid for killing and maiming fellow Human-beings? It is horrible, how religion eats our sanity and makes monsters out of us.
Nevertheless, some have argued that these men who strap themselves with explosives or those who walk into the streets on a busy day and begin to separate heads from bodies with machetes are not Muslims. So now, I seek to know: is it mere accusation or propaganda that most of the suicide bombers are Muslims and are they not known to cry out loudly, “Allah Akbar” before detonating their weapons of destructions and wrecking havoc on both themselves and innocent, unfortunate others?
It is okay to die for what one believes in but there is absolutely no sense in making others die for it too. I agree that I may not know the grievances of these defiant ones but whatever it is, what would force a man to blow-up himself, fellow citizens, brothers in the faith, and a few foreign nationals? Then again if Islam preaches peace, why do these other adherents choose to self-destruct and take the part of violence rather than seek peaceful resolution.
Finally, I do not write this with any form of bias in mind, neither do I intend to condemn Islam, but to appeal to the conscience of well meaning Muslims who see these things but for fear of being labelled an infidel, do and say nothing. It’s about time someone spoke up in the defence of Islam; evangelising what the faith really stands for. Ignorant as I may seem, what I know is this; no one man has the monopoly of violence and there is a clear distinction between love and hate, peace and war. Asallam allekum!
During my days as a corps member, my closest friend was a calm and gentle Muslim. In the wake of the Boko-Haram crisis, while I was bemoaning the onslaught and the fact that the north is highly flammable like an open keg of petrol waiting for a naked flame, my friend told me that Islam actually means peace; to guide my judgement. I was surprised because I was hearing this for the first time but only now, it made me more confused.
Truly, Islam may mean peace but Scars from the 9/11 terrorist attack still hurt and recent attacks in northern Nigeria by the Boko-Haram sect, Farouk Abdul-Muttalab’s saga, and daily news of bombings from around the world where Muslims are predominant makes it hard to synonymise Islam with peace.
In northern Nigeria, citing the case of the Boko-Haram sect, whose leader; an Islamic scholar and cleric, gathered together or should I say recruited ignorant and vulnerable faithful and began to indoctrinate them against all things western and non-Islam. He certainly was preaching violence as he and his followers left sorrow, tears and blood in the city where they struck. I ask again then, as a cleric and scholar of Islam wasn’t he supposed to be preaching peace? Clearly, he wasn’t.
However, before I am misunderstood, I am not saying that any religion is void of extremism or its manifestations but please watch CNN or even the news from the local stations and you will not be surprised as news of the consequences of men who kill and maim in God’s name and to punish America (like some believe), or like Boko-Haram; to protest against western or anti-Islam education, and for other various reasons begin to roll-in by the hour like the stock market update.
I am moved to tears each time I hear of these killings in Afghanistan, Iraq, Borno, Bauchi, Jos, Kano, and many other places where Islam prevails. It hurts more when I hear that men who carry out these dastardly acts do so for the purpose of attaining al-Jana (heaven) and a promise of a certain number of virgins(I stand to be corrected). How cruel! What kind of god allows you into paradise and gets you laid for killing and maiming fellow Human-beings? It is horrible, how religion eats our sanity and makes monsters out of us.
Nevertheless, some have argued that these men who strap themselves with explosives or those who walk into the streets on a busy day and begin to separate heads from bodies with machetes are not Muslims. So now, I seek to know: is it mere accusation or propaganda that most of the suicide bombers are Muslims and are they not known to cry out loudly, “Allah Akbar” before detonating their weapons of destructions and wrecking havoc on both themselves and innocent, unfortunate others?
It is okay to die for what one believes in but there is absolutely no sense in making others die for it too. I agree that I may not know the grievances of these defiant ones but whatever it is, what would force a man to blow-up himself, fellow citizens, brothers in the faith, and a few foreign nationals? Then again if Islam preaches peace, why do these other adherents choose to self-destruct and take the part of violence rather than seek peaceful resolution.
Finally, I do not write this with any form of bias in mind, neither do I intend to condemn Islam, but to appeal to the conscience of well meaning Muslims who see these things but for fear of being labelled an infidel, do and say nothing. It’s about time someone spoke up in the defence of Islam; evangelising what the faith really stands for. Ignorant as I may seem, what I know is this; no one man has the monopoly of violence and there is a clear distinction between love and hate, peace and war. Asallam allekum!
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
THE ROSARY; NOT THE BLING-BLING
Today’s youths, with the oil prices fluctuating and the global stock market struggling to recover from recession, have no choice but to invest in fashion. Consequently, the days of oil boom have been put behind us, with the fashion boom taking its stead. Now, I have no problem with the outrageous and burgeoning craze for fashion as I too am fashion savvy but what I won’t condone is when we begin to equate sacred beads and divine items with the BLING-BLING.
Growing up, I was a devout member of the Block Rosary Crusade and since then, I have remained devoted to praying the Rosary while counting on its beads. Hitherto, some wore the Rosary as a sign of their faith, some others wore it for protection from evil, but more recently people now wear it as a fashion accessory. Ave Maria!
The recent increase in the sales of the rosary noticed in the Catholic Church has drawn the attention of its leaders. This increase in rosary sales has been attributed to rising popularity amongst the youths, celebrities and rock stars, who favour it as the jewellery of choice. How spiritual! Rock stars and celebrities like Britney spears, Tyrese, David Beckham, to mention a few, have been photographed wearing the rosary without any pious affiliations or obligations. Many of the celebrities who also adorn these holy beads are either atheist or Satanist. Then you wonder what the significance of the rosary on their necks is; a fashion statement, mockery of the church or a contradiction to religion?
These days it is a common thing to see agberos (street urchins) wearing more than one rosary at a time while harassing bus drivers and causing a menace to the society. I even have friends who are non-Catholic, some Muslims who own more than 3 different rosaries to match different colours of their several rock star tops. Some seem to favour them more with tattooed shirts which have designs filled with various depictions of Satanism in form of skulls, guns, blood, knives, thorns and roses. What a contrast! Painfully, young Catholics like me walk this same path. Rather than use the rosary to pray, they join others who desecrate and use them as blings to up their swag. More so, regarding the fact that the rosary is cheaper than the bling-bling, its sheer affordability and availability have made it the premium bling of choice for every vilde, tansa and fashionista.
However, I understand that some rosaries are so beautifully crafted and designed that one is tempted to mistake it for a fashion accessory but just in case people have forgotten the differences between the rosary and the blings, I will remind them. While the bling-bling may be worn as fashion accessory and may have pendants ranging from skulls, guns, upside-down crosses etc, hanging from it, the rosary, unlike the blings, is an object of prayer, with a crucifix hanging down from it and so it must be revered. From history the rosary was handed down to saints who used it to perform great miracles and achieve divine feats, but the same can’t be said of the bling-bling.
In a world where darkness is overshadowing light at an alarming speed, people; especially the vulnerable young, quickly adopt abomination as a norm. It is a mocking enough to describe the devil as beautiful and charming but please do not describe Jesus as SEXY! One female artist already did, referring to Jesus on the cross as shirtless and hot. Lord, have mercy on us. Then again if you see me wearing a platinum or emerald rosary on my neck and my shirt seems to match, do not judge me because I am probably travelling, walking the streets at night, or saying this prayer; Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and until we realise what a sacrilege we have immersed ourselves in by using the Rosary as Bling –bling.
Growing up, I was a devout member of the Block Rosary Crusade and since then, I have remained devoted to praying the Rosary while counting on its beads. Hitherto, some wore the Rosary as a sign of their faith, some others wore it for protection from evil, but more recently people now wear it as a fashion accessory. Ave Maria!
The recent increase in the sales of the rosary noticed in the Catholic Church has drawn the attention of its leaders. This increase in rosary sales has been attributed to rising popularity amongst the youths, celebrities and rock stars, who favour it as the jewellery of choice. How spiritual! Rock stars and celebrities like Britney spears, Tyrese, David Beckham, to mention a few, have been photographed wearing the rosary without any pious affiliations or obligations. Many of the celebrities who also adorn these holy beads are either atheist or Satanist. Then you wonder what the significance of the rosary on their necks is; a fashion statement, mockery of the church or a contradiction to religion?
These days it is a common thing to see agberos (street urchins) wearing more than one rosary at a time while harassing bus drivers and causing a menace to the society. I even have friends who are non-Catholic, some Muslims who own more than 3 different rosaries to match different colours of their several rock star tops. Some seem to favour them more with tattooed shirts which have designs filled with various depictions of Satanism in form of skulls, guns, blood, knives, thorns and roses. What a contrast! Painfully, young Catholics like me walk this same path. Rather than use the rosary to pray, they join others who desecrate and use them as blings to up their swag. More so, regarding the fact that the rosary is cheaper than the bling-bling, its sheer affordability and availability have made it the premium bling of choice for every vilde, tansa and fashionista.
However, I understand that some rosaries are so beautifully crafted and designed that one is tempted to mistake it for a fashion accessory but just in case people have forgotten the differences between the rosary and the blings, I will remind them. While the bling-bling may be worn as fashion accessory and may have pendants ranging from skulls, guns, upside-down crosses etc, hanging from it, the rosary, unlike the blings, is an object of prayer, with a crucifix hanging down from it and so it must be revered. From history the rosary was handed down to saints who used it to perform great miracles and achieve divine feats, but the same can’t be said of the bling-bling.
In a world where darkness is overshadowing light at an alarming speed, people; especially the vulnerable young, quickly adopt abomination as a norm. It is a mocking enough to describe the devil as beautiful and charming but please do not describe Jesus as SEXY! One female artist already did, referring to Jesus on the cross as shirtless and hot. Lord, have mercy on us. Then again if you see me wearing a platinum or emerald rosary on my neck and my shirt seems to match, do not judge me because I am probably travelling, walking the streets at night, or saying this prayer; Holy Mary, mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and until we realise what a sacrilege we have immersed ourselves in by using the Rosary as Bling –bling.
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
25 RAMDOM THINGS ABOUT ME
1. My name is also Sylvester.
2. I was named Richard after my father and Sylvester after my grand father!
3. I have a phobia for a mother hen.(had a bad experience as a kid)
4. My brand of beer is Gulder!
5. I never had pimples as an adolescent and till now.I only get pimples when I drink Star.
6. If there was no God,I would worship my mother.
7. I am passionate about my family and friends.
8. I hate boiled fresh fish,but I eat cat fish pepper soup-point n fire!
9. I'm a Gemini!
10. I love me a bottle of fine wine and a lady on high heels anytime
11. I'm afraid of not getting a 6packs before am to old to show dem off!
12. I love to write
13. Love to party- I can and love to dance a lot!
14. I hate doing dishes
15. I don't eat every part of a chicken.I only eat the drum sticks.
16. I don't actually have a favorite meal....I absolutely love to eat.
17. I wish I was bigger and could weigh up to 85kg.(I weigh 75.4kg)
18.I talk!
19. I have been called D'banj ,Tu-face, 9ice n Obiwon and once, a girl said I have Lemar's eyes.
20. I've been drunk and wasted, twice.
21. Looking good is my bad habit.
22. I'm an arsenal fan!but I'ld still eat my meal if dey lose a game.
23. Traveling by air,room service,Baileys and Red label are a few of my favorite things!
24. I'm Mr.niceguy-Very caring!
25. You have to meet me to find out the remaining 1000000000975!
2. I was named Richard after my father and Sylvester after my grand father!
3. I have a phobia for a mother hen.(had a bad experience as a kid)
4. My brand of beer is Gulder!
5. I never had pimples as an adolescent and till now.I only get pimples when I drink Star.
6. If there was no God,I would worship my mother.
7. I am passionate about my family and friends.
8. I hate boiled fresh fish,but I eat cat fish pepper soup-point n fire!
9. I'm a Gemini!
10. I love me a bottle of fine wine and a lady on high heels anytime
11. I'm afraid of not getting a 6packs before am to old to show dem off!
12. I love to write
13. Love to party- I can and love to dance a lot!
14. I hate doing dishes
15. I don't eat every part of a chicken.I only eat the drum sticks.
16. I don't actually have a favorite meal....I absolutely love to eat.
17. I wish I was bigger and could weigh up to 85kg.(I weigh 75.4kg)
18.I talk!
19. I have been called D'banj ,Tu-face, 9ice n Obiwon and once, a girl said I have Lemar's eyes.
20. I've been drunk and wasted, twice.
21. Looking good is my bad habit.
22. I'm an arsenal fan!but I'ld still eat my meal if dey lose a game.
23. Traveling by air,room service,Baileys and Red label are a few of my favorite things!
24. I'm Mr.niceguy-Very caring!
25. You have to meet me to find out the remaining 1000000000975!
THE NYSC ANTHEM
Youths obey the clarion call(just to be patriotic)
-Let us lift our nation high(since our leaders cant lift it from age long greed)
-Under the sun or in the rain(please,na we spoil am,how much we chop)
-With dedication and selflessness(with N9,500,dedication only)
-Nigeria is ours(although a few get the cash)
-,Nigeria we serve!(monkey dey work,baboon they chop)
-Let us lift our nation high(since our leaders cant lift it from age long greed)
-Under the sun or in the rain(please,na we spoil am,how much we chop)
-With dedication and selflessness(with N9,500,dedication only)
-Nigeria is ours(although a few get the cash)
-,Nigeria we serve!(monkey dey work,baboon they chop)
RULES OF THE GAME
Without trying to sound like an archetypal male, here are some rules governing going out with boys;
1. Never play hard to get cos on the long run you might seem the cheapest of them all.
2. Try as much as possible to show that you appreciate his presence by hugging or kissing him in public, adjusting his shirt....you know the stuffs PDA (public display of affection) is made of!
3. Be proud of your boyfriend. Don't be ashamed to say "he is my love or boyfriend" when you introduce him to friends.
4. Never collect raw cash from him except in cases where you really need to do so. Try as much as possible to show him you don't love him because of this money.
5. Show him that you are more caring by giving him more love or affection than he offers.
6. Make him realize that you don't need his money by giving him more expensive gifts than he gives or has given you.
7. Last of all try to keep your affair with him secret i.e. what you say to each other, but feel free to boast of his sexual prowess to your friends!
1. Never play hard to get cos on the long run you might seem the cheapest of them all.
2. Try as much as possible to show that you appreciate his presence by hugging or kissing him in public, adjusting his shirt....you know the stuffs PDA (public display of affection) is made of!
3. Be proud of your boyfriend. Don't be ashamed to say "he is my love or boyfriend" when you introduce him to friends.
4. Never collect raw cash from him except in cases where you really need to do so. Try as much as possible to show him you don't love him because of this money.
5. Show him that you are more caring by giving him more love or affection than he offers.
6. Make him realize that you don't need his money by giving him more expensive gifts than he gives or has given you.
7. Last of all try to keep your affair with him secret i.e. what you say to each other, but feel free to boast of his sexual prowess to your friends!
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